ExpectingWords.com - Helping expecting couples find the right words at the right times

Most people think about the New Year as a good time to lose weight, exercise more often or stop smoking.  But when one is pregnant, the New Year means something entirely different.  We stop dwelling on our appearance and start thinking about who we are, our purpose in life and what values and lessons we can share with our baby-to-be.

Taken from my journal during the time that I was expecting, here are my six New Year’s resolutions for becoming a better person, a better parent and a better partner:

1) Give Grandparent Goodness.
Pay more attention to the soon-to-be grandparents.  Cherish them for all that they give to us and for all the ways they care about us.  Call them more often.  Recognize that we are going to need them much more than we had ever imagined.

2) Be Happily Married.
Fight less with my spouse.  Once a baby enters the family, there is so much more to bicker about, so put on my mediator’s hat now and learn to fight less and compromise more before a little one is around to listen to our arguments.  (For tips on how to stop bickering with your spouse read my article on Web MD.) (more…)

On December 3, I had the privilege of participating in It’s Time to Talk Day, an event in New York City sponsored by Liz Claiborne, Inc. and partners to encourage public dialogue about domestic violence and teen dating abuse.  I interviewed a handful of talented people that day (I will blog about those interviews later), but today, I want to share my surprisingly candid interview with Tim Gunn from Project Runway, who is the Chief Creative Officer of Liz Claiborne.

You rose to fame as the charming mentor to the designers on the reality television program Project Runway. Then you created your own TV show, Tim Gunn’s Guide to Style. Where did the idea for your TV show come from?

My TV show Guide to Style came from my book A Guide to Quality, Taste and Style. Abrams imprint had asked me to write a makeover/self-help book and I didn’t want to do it.  So many fashion books and shows preach about the right and wrong pants and such.  You see people being dressed by stylists and then they leave, now what?  I’d rather help someone who thinks she is in a fashion rut and needs help getting unstuck.  I don’t care how people dress, as long as they accept responsibility for it (unless someone is bearing midriff on a city street).  I can’t shop for someone.  I will shop with, not for.  People ask me if I want to do follow up visits with the guests on my show to see if they stuck with the change.  I tell them, “no” because I don’t care if they stuck with it.  It’s their choice, their freedom. (more…)

When I was single I was selfishly happy. Not in a hurtful way to others, but in a natural way because I was my number one priority. Those were the days when I could choose whatever time was best for me to socialize, eat, sleep, work or take a long, hot shower.

Then I got married and that selfish feeling began to diminish, for good reason. That selfish single “me” became a less selfish “we.” I’d wake up in the morning and make coffee and eggo waffles for both of us. We’d take our turns using the bathroom, and then talk about what would be best for us to do together that evening or weekend day.

Then I had a baby. In just one day I went from a slightly selfish “we” to a totally unselfish three. Sleep? No way, I have to feed a baby. Eat? Whatever’s leftover will do. Socialize? No thanks, I have to save up my energy for those early mornings. Bathroom time, um, better hold it in until later. The baby needs a diaper change, like right now. When the newborn stage moved to the baby stage things calmed down a bit. I might have tried to take a relaxing bath while my husband cared for our son, but then I’d hear my son’s whaling cry and oh, well, maybe I should go help. So I’d shut off the water and scrap the bubble bath for a quickie shower. (more…)

If you’re reading this you’re probably pregnant and looking forward to your due date because the greatest (or certainly the most powerful) memory will be of the actual birth experience itself. But during those 280 days or so before the arrival of your beautiful baby, many things will happen that will become permanently etched in your memory.

One of my favorite things to talk about with my husband now are our best moments during my pregnancy. I encourage you and your mate to enjoy a similar conversation. I’ll share my first best moment with you and I hope you will take a minute to share yours with me.

My first best moment

Mine was definitely seeing the heartbeat on the ultrasound. Filled with increasing anxiety and fear as the ultrasound day approached, I had come up with every imaginable reason (thank you google!) why we might not see the heartbeat. I was preparing myself for anything. I entered the examining room, positioned myself on the exam table and waiting. Then my doctor entered the room and as the instrument was inserted my husband and I held hands in silence waiting for the image to appear on the screen. (more…)

A babymoon is a trip for moms and dads-to-be to spend time together and nurture their relationship. Why babymoon you ask? Because it’ll be your last peaceful vacation for many years to come. You know all that well-meaning advice that makes you wonder why you decided to have a baby? “Sleep now because you’ll never sleep again!” “Go out to dinner now because you won’t have an uninterrupted meal for at least five years.” And I remember the heart-warming advice from a real estate agent friend: “take pictures of your house because soon enough you won’t remember what it looked like before your living room became a jungle gym.”

Sadly, all that advice is true. So if you have the time, plan an old-fashioned stay-in-bed-late vacation. Whether you can drive to a nearby getaway and stay at the Marriott, or take a week’s trip to Aruba, it’ll be worth your while, as it was for these babymooners at Baby GaGa and these over at Babyzone. A great time to do this is during the second trimester when the mom-to-be tends to feel less nauseous than she felt in the first trimester and less tired than she will feel in the third trimester.

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